Warning: Keep knife out of children

Nano #6 &7

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 22:59:39 GMT

Hrm - tired. Caught in the midst of mood swings.

Am hoping it didn't effect my writing.

Forgot to put the update up last night, so this is the amalgamated entry for two days. This part contains my first step at skipping over time, rather than describing everything the character is doing - don't know how it worked. But I'm going to have to perfect it, as plotty as I like things, I just don't have enough to fill every minute of every day.

Fri 6 (off) Daily: 4168 Total: 12504 Achieved: 4234, Total: 15482
Sat 7 Daily: 2084 Total: 14588 Achieved: 2084, Total: 17566
Sun 8 Daily: 2084 Total: 16672 Achieved: 2129, Tota: 19695
Mon 9 Daily: 2084 Total: 18756

Not as far ahead as I'd like, but ok.

Woo.

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 14:45:57 GMT

Yet to head off to the game and have managed 1200 words.

I call this win.

Nano #5.

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 23:46:41 GMT

Took me long enough.

Credit to Three Doors Down - not on my normal playlist, but very helpful as background music as I'm trying to meet my word count.

Schedule so far:

Thurs 5 Daily: 2084 Total: 8336 Achieved: 2803, Total: 11248
Fri 6 (off) Daily: 4168 Total: 12504 Achieved: 4234, Total: 15482
Sat 7 Daily: 2084 Total: 14588

I admit to getting the giggles in the first page of this entry. Then UST came and stomped all over my fun.

Other humourous thing of the day: this article, stolen from sf_d.

Gave final day of working to current employers. They reacted as if they had a choice int he matter, promising me that they'd 'get back to me monday'.

They seem not to have grasped that their choice is limited to having me for the next three weeks or me not coming back. And if they dare even kick up the slightest bit of a fuss, I'm going to go with the second option. I don't need to work the next three weeks - yay, overdraft - so if they want to stab themselves in the groin, up to them.

Need to book driving test. First I need to write up some Pro stuff for the GM for tomorrow's game.

Then I firmly intend to sleep. Yay for night games - late game means late start means I get a lie in - first one in a while.

Nano #4.

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 23:26:16 GMT

Slightly better day. I like this bit.

Update so far:

Thurs 5 Daily: 2084 Total: 8336 Achieved: 2803, Total: 11248
Fri 6 (off) Daily: 4168 Total: 12504

EDIT: At one point today, I was thinking over what's left to happen, and worrying that I didn't have enough plot left to fill 50k.

Then I spent this evening spending the best part of 3K words getting a character locked in a cupboard.

I think I'm going to be fine - I just need to remember that my plot speed is very far from breakneck, and it will all be fine.

Bed now. Day off tomorrow. Thank god.

Nano #3.

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 23:12:21 GMT

Thanks to rather large arguement with the mothership, only word count todayis what I managed to hammer out at work during a spare hour when everything was done, everyone was out and we had no clients.

The good news is that this is 2438.

The bad news is the spelling.

Update on schedule so far:

Sun 1 Daily: 2084 Total: 2084 Achieved: 4953
Mon 2 Daily: 2084 Total: 4168 Achieved: 1053, Total: 6007
Tues 3 (Shadow run)
Wed 4 Daily: 2084 Total: 6252 Achieved: 2438, Total: 8445
Thurs 5 Daily: 2084 Total: 8336

Little over a day ahead - still keeping my head above water in case of another day like Monday then. Dead knackered. Half day tomorrow, thank god.

Never mind - it's of slightly better quality than Monday's, at least.

Yesterday and today's amalgamated entry in a filtered post following - comment to be added.

Nano Schedule

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 09:00:15 GMT

Following the examples of pujaemuss and cheekychipmunk, I've done myself a little timetable.

It is possibly not quite the intended outcome that I now feel more intimidated than before...

Total days unable to write: 9
Days remaining: 21
Days off work and thus counting as double word count: 3
Thus total days: 24
Total word count required each normal day: 2084
Number of words required on an 'off' day: 4168

Sun 1 Daily: 2084 Total: 2084 Achieved: 4953
Mon 2 Daily: 2084 Total: 4168 Achieved: 1053, Total: 6007
Tues 3 (Shadow run)
Wed 4 Daily: 2084 Total: 6252
Thurs 5 Daily: 2084 Total: 8336
Fri 6 (off) Daily: 4168 Total: 12504
Sat 7 Daily: 2084 Total: 14588
Sun 8 Daily: 2084 Total: 16672
Mon 9 Daily: 2084 Total: 18756
Tues 10 (Shadow run)
Wed 11 Daily: 2084 Total: 20840
Thurs 12 Daily: 2084 Total: 22924
Fri 13 (Banquet)
Sat 14 (Banquet)
Sun 15 (Banquet)
Mon 16 (Off) Daily: 4168 Total: 27092 (half way point!)
Tues 17 (Shadow run)
Wed 18 Daily: 2084 Total: 29176
Thurs 19 Daily: 2084 Total: 31260
Fri 20 Daily: 2084 Total: 33344
Sat 21 (Charli's visit)
Sun 22 (Charli's visit)
Mon 23 Daily: 2084 Total: 35428
Tues 24 (Shadow run)
Wed 25 Daily: 2084 Total: 37512
Thurs 26 Daily: 2084 Total: 39596
Fri 27 (off) Daily: 4168 Total: 43764
Sat 28 Daily: 2084 Total: 45848
Sun 29 Daily: 2084 Total: 47932
Mon 30 Daily: 2084 Total: 50016

So...actually, I'm not that far ahead at all. Argh.

Nano #1

Sun, 01 Nov 2009 23:13:47 GMT

Daily word count: 4953

Tired. Bed now.

For anyone having trouble meeting their quota, might I suggest Write Or Die. Just make sure you C&P to an open Word document every 5 mins or so - it doesn't have an auto save function, so if your brower crashes after a 3 hour session - like it did to me last year - you can loose all your work. Not fun. Especially given it wasn't just the 1 day quota of 1.6K, I'd managed to clock 5K.

Not so sure I like the tone of how this is turning - it feels more colloquial and less flowing. I keep writing conversation between two of my characters and wondering if I'm using words or concepts or verbal rhythms that are far too modern for the time period.

Never mind. The point of Nano is just to write, right? Will correct when it's finished.

NaNoWriMo

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 12:45:22 GMT

Starts on Sunday. For my next trick, I will be attempting to finish the story I started last year, which should land it at a neat 100-110k words; nicely novel length. And good thing too, because I never normally would write stories of this length were it not for this month's annual escapade.

Just one problem with this; while I know in the roughest of rough terms how it should end, I'm not sure on an awful lot of stuff.

So, would very much like people's opinions: if you are willing, drop a comment below with your addy and I'll email you a copy (or if you read it last year and remember it, that works too).

Then, if I could ask you to answer some of the questions below the cut, that would be wonderful. Don't feel obliged to answer all of them (although if you want to, that's fantastic and I'll love you forever). Just answer the ones that you actually have an answer to, rather than having to think of one.

And just so people know, telling me why of anything (so for instance, why so-and-so is their favourite character) is always appreciated, because otherwise I might not get which parts of them you like and might skim over them.

Questions:

- Are there any glaring plot holes so far? Or anything at all that stood out as not making sense?
- Are there any glaring inaccuracies with regards to time period?
- Pagans - is my portrayl of the gods in question ok, or is any of it offensive? If the latter, how so and thus how would you like me to fix it?
- Who is your favourite character?
- Who is your least favourite character?
- Are there any characters you'd like to see get together?
- Are there any characters you'd like to see more of, or know more about?
- Have any of the characters surprised you, or made you question whether their characterisation has slipped?
- Is there anything about the heroine that makes you want to pick her up and shake her with sheer annoyance?
- Is Alec behaving in an age appropriate manner, or have I made him too old for his years?
- How do you think the story will end?
- How would you like the story to end?
- Is Andromeda's POV ok from a perspective consideration, or would you like to see through someone else's eyes for a while; switch things around?
- Is the writing style ok? Has it stayed constant, or has it changed from how it started off? If it's changed, are you ok with that, or would you prefer it had remained as it started out/ended?
- Do you atually like the story, or did you read what's there of it out of obligation? Is it readable? Did it draw you in or did you have to work to feel involved?

I'm sure I'll end up with more later, but that's all I can thin of right now.

For anyone that does this for me: thank you thank you thank you so much. I owe you chocolate.

I dub today a Good Day.

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 11:36:50 GMT

So far, at least - let's not spoil that winning streak.

My parents came down on Wednesday, and went back today, just to spend a couple of days in the city - they're coming back for the Christmas market. I think they're gradually beginning to see why Joe and I and Doug never want to leave.

By unhappy circumstance, they managed to ring me on Wednesday at exactly the moment that I was having a little bit of a crynig session over work - stress + tiredness + no way out = Emma who needs a quiet corner for a bit - and by yesterday, having heard the story, and gotten opinions in from collegues who work in IT and realised that chances of me getting a job while having a 2 month notice period to serve are minimal, they made me an offer - I quit, do my two months, if I don't find a job in that time, they'll pay my wage, providing I genuinely look for jobs.

I confess, it's a bit of a knock to my pride to take it - it's something I've always been very proud of, and the one thing that my siblings can't match. Whereas I'm quite happy for my parents to do things like holidays, or whatever, they're luxury items - they're things I don't need. I have always been able to make it on my own. None of my siblings can claim that - they're dependant on regular handouts and unashamedly hit Mum and Dad up for more cash when they go home - which there's nothing wrong with, it should be pointed out, because Mum and Dad have always been quite happy to give and would tell them if they were pushing it too far.

But I have always been very proud of the fact that I haven't needed to, and while they occasionally buy me stuff when they're down, it's stuff I could always have managed to get by without or could have eventually bought myself, and I have never, never asked for it. Even at this time two years ago when I left ADP, I found a way of making ends meet without using them. I can't help but feel I'm cheating at life to make use of an advantage that happens to have been given to so ridiculously few people.

To be fair, this time, I didn't ask either - they offered and the reasons they cited make enough sense that I feel I'd be letting pride get in my way if I didn't take it. And that would be really rather inexcusably stupid.

And my mother pointed out that my current mindset probably isn't going to do my job hunting much good, and she was right - looking back over the applications I've made over the past few days, the enthusiasm I thought I was exuding now reads more like desperation. Which isn't good, and I'll probably have to write those off, but oh well.

So yes, goo day - last night, we went toe ht Rajpoot; lovely meal as always. This morning I handed my notice in (popped into work despite it being my day off), then went for brunch with my brother, sister and mother, Dad having gone back early this morning to go golfing. Wandered around Waterstones for a bit, Mum bought 2 of those buy 3for2 books, so ended up getting me one as well as it was free.

Then had more fun than I've had in a long time, when my mother insisted on including me in my brother's traditional student trip to Sainsbury's, as they've come up with a way of limiting the amount of stuff Joe buys; he'd have the whole store if he could. Mum walks with a trolley down the central aisle at a sedate walking pace, before progressing to the checkout. We were allowed whatever was in the trolley at the point the last item was scanned.

Cue mania.

My brother - a 6'4 blonde rugby player - promptly started flailing around the store, mostly in the direction of the jarred pasta sauce aisle (Erg) and the meat section - I think he managed 6 packets of bacon, and no fewer than 8 pints of milk. Some cooperation was set up on the things like pasta and rice, and it became a bit of a strategic planning problem as well, when a load of the older generation, moving at a snails pace, also descended upon the place to do their shopping. 'Land the tin of chopped tomatoes in the trolley without braining an OAP' suddenly became a ranged event, with some aerobic exercise being derived from hurdling the baskets that would appear seemingly at random on the shop floor.

I now have a full cupboard. Hurrah.

I feel better. Hurrah.

My flat is a tip as my lack of energy from the last fortnight has meant I've pretty much dropped things on the floor, and then left them where they lie. I plan to spend some of today being a domestic goddess. I will also pop out and see if I can unearth something to wear to Louisa's murder mystery party tomorrow evening.

I have a new book. Hurrah.

A Good Day. Or, at least, certainly better than it has been.

[Boost signal][Save Dave's House]

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 22:48:33 GMT

Hi guys,

People need help. This is the story. There is an auction in the offing if folks are interested (see below) or just plain giving. Or boost the signal again if you can't afford anything - it's what I'm doing.

Go here to partake in auctiony goodness, there are many shinies.

Meme

Mon, 19 Oct 2009 22:31:18 GMT

Will post something meaningful - like replies to my last entry - in a while. Thank you all for the support if you said something; it's much appreciated. For now, mindless meme under the cut:

I am : Emma, tired, sore, weary.

I think : too slowly for my own patience, not enough, with my heart and pride rather than with my head.

I know : so much less than I want to. A couple of years ago, my knowledge level was almost enough to meet my ambition. Now, it's nowhere near. I can't work out if the world got bigger, my brain got smaller, or my ambition simply sky rocketted.

I want : a career that pays enough to let me save for a life, a holiday, a cat, to be happy and healthy and for everyone around me to have the same.

I have : the best boyfriend in the world, wonderful friends, a beautiful city, a means-well-but-occasionally-flawed family who I love dearly, the makings of a great life if I coudl just bring the 'me' part up to standard.

I wish : it would all go right for a change. That we'd have some time where something wasn't going wrong. That I had the ability to ignore the fact that things will go wrong all the time and just relax and feel carefree.

I hate : bigots, nepotism, people who argue just to get a rise out of others, trolls, lies.

I miss : the simplicity of childhood that I never knew I had and never appreciated. Some aspects of people that are now gone because I couldn't get past their flaws. The list of dead folks I keep in my head. Right now, I think Pat is at the top. He most often is when I feel like this.

I fear : loosing Doug. #1 nightmare right there. Couple of months ago, someone at work told me there were police around where my house was, and my paranoia blew it up into wondering if something had happened to him and I wouldn't know until I got there. I actually teared up when I got to the point that I could see my road and realised that all teh kerfuffle was on the other side of the street.

I hear : faint music from Doug's room. The hum of the fridge. The hum of my tower. The hum of my monitor. The faint buzz that tells me the TV is on standby. Faint tinitus in my right ear that I never admit to any doctor or they'd stop me diving. Veeeeery faint base that must be coming from a floor or two up, and is to the exact beat of 'what what in the butt'. That amuses me.

I smell : remnants of dinner - coq au vin with crushed potato, sauteed celery julian and steam spring greens. Why yes, I have been watching Masterchef - thank you very much.

I crave : Sleep. So tired. But not yet at sufficient energy depravation to sleep. A shower. But, ironically, now too late to have one - tomorrow morning then. Joy.

I seek : an impossibly perfect truth, because one person's version is not like another's.

I wonder : whether I actually want to know what people think of me. Even those that are close to me - that impossible truth up there means I undoubtedly would find a lot of stuff I wouldn't like. Which then makes me question why I'm friends with them. Then I get all tangled up and have to think my way off the subject or I get caught in a downward spiral.

I regret : not much. I worry too much that choosing differently in life would have meant I don't have the partner, the friends I have now, and they're very precious to me. If I had the guarantee I wouldn't loose them? Doing physics at uni. Not thinking things through often enough with some things. Not being smarter with others.

I love : Doug. My friends - have I mentioned those two enough yet? My family. My cat. LARP when I have no OOC responsibility - BLADES drove me nuts. CP is driving me nuts, and all people want from me there are my opinions. Thank fuck Elysium is blissfully drama free, or I'd have gone mad long ago.

I ache : at the back of my beck until it sperads up to wrap around the back of my skull, crossing over to form a pressure band across my forehead and some of the pain leaks down into my cheekbones. My headaches are apparently highly unsual and have baffled all the docs I've told about them. Now I just wait them out and make sure I've met my liquid and sleep ration to avoid as many as possible.

I was not : a straight forward child. I was outgoing and confident until I was about 8 or 9, at which point it apparently hit home that I was neither physically attractive nor popular, and I became a withdrawn and shy and almost shameful child overnight. I know it baffled my parents, but they tell me now that as a result I'm the 'level headed one'. I'm still unsure as to whether this is a good thing.

I am not : straight forward. Still. Patient. Forgiving unless I really really like you. Touchy feely. Easily trusting. Thick skinned.

I cry : when I have no choice. I hate it - it feels like a loss of control. It tends to only happen when I'm very tired or very emotionally knocked. I think it comes from the number of people I lost during the really formulative years that happen around your early teens. Other people were crying and out of cotnrol when it happened, so someone had to be responsible and it ended up being me. Now when I cry, I can't shake the feeling that I'm letting people down by having a moment when I'm not capable of looking out for everyone else.

I believe : in a higher being. In an afterlife. In love. In things happening for a reason, even if you might never work it out.

I dance : infrequently. I occasionally bounce around my room to relieve stress, but it's not really the same. I find myself occasionally looking at blocks on ebay. Thank god for having abnormally wide feet, for I never find my size, and so the temptation never arises.

I sing : only with Doug. I dislike my voice.

I read : whenever I have the chance. I'm finding it harder to love books now though - when I was younger, I'd plough through everything and declare I couldn't do without any of it. Now, I'm more picky.

I don't always : do the laundry when I should.

I fight : because I'm afraid of what surrender will do to me.

I write : not nearly enough, and not at a standard that I find acceptable. Other people seem to like it though.

I win : next to nothing - I try not to put myself in competition with other people these days.

I lose : my temper often, because it's often easier than feeling a more complicated emotion.

I never : use smash.

I always : try to be honest unless it's not my secret to tell. Which surprises a lot of people, but folks don't seem to realise that there's a difference between being honest and volunteering information if people haven't asked you for it.

I confuse : people at work, but they seem to like me anyway. It's the upside with my work. Bosses are slimy and conniving, pay is shit, hours are long, duties are hideous and far more than we get paid for - but the people are nice, and I get to hold a puppy about once a week.

I listen : but don't always hear, no matter how hard I try. In my defense, if I know I've gotten something wrong, I try again. But sometimes I hear, it's just people are saying things they don't mean to which are far more revealing than their intended sentiment. Half a dozen of one, 6 of the other.

I can usually be found : at a computer, or with Doug.

I am scared : of being alone. Not for the rest of my life, but packing up the surgery on myown in the dark has lways given me the willies, and I think, always will.

I need : to sleep. And to hug Doug. Didn't we have this one already?

I am happy : when I don't have to think about the realities of life. Doesn't happen often, nowadays.

Damnit!

Wed, 07 Oct 2009 20:44:40 GMT

I normally never give two damns about clothes or shoes.

So explain why I suddenly really really want this, and why I'm salivating over pretty much everything on this page.

They are pretty though.

So.

Mon, 05 Oct 2009 19:41:32 GMT

Today I was offered a job in Surrey.

They would have needed me to start next week, so what with the whole actually-having-a-life thing, I turned them down.

But still. Nice to know I'm apparently not *that* unemployable.

Grandfather's funeral...

Thu, 24 Sep 2009 18:26:50 GMT

...was thankfully, more unemotional than I was predicting, in main because the priest both had an accent and muttered a lot, so the eulogy he gave was pretty hard to decipher.

Didn't get the job I've been waiting for for the past year and a bit. This shoots in the head things like Doug and my plans for things like getting married and thinking in the general direction of the property ladder. It also means that moving not just out of Bath, but also out of the South and thus away from easy reach of my family, just at a time when it has become apparent how important it is at times to be close to them, is looking a lot more likely.

Can safely say that as birthdays go, this one has been the worse one yet.

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 19:14:17 GMT

Ahem, so, today midget_gem grabs me on MSN and announces she has an early birthday present for me, courtesy of a swap with adorna.

And then presents me with this:

Yes, it's Rega. Seriously...how unbelievably cool is that?

Failing. To. Contain. SQUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

If you are one of the people who happened to be on MSN in thelast few minutes who I grabbed horribly unannounced and screamed LOOKIT LOOKIT LOOKIT...er, apologies.

Sun, 20 Sep 2009 19:30:18 GMT

I am now in pain, having been thoroughly mauled in the name of providing entertainment to one homesick kitten. Who managed to somehow bite me *under* one of my fingernails, the bastard.

And then to top a grand day off...I've locked my keys in work. *headdesk*

At least my phone is working again. No idea why though.

WTF?

Sun, 20 Sep 2009 12:05:59 GMT

Mozilla FF's programme for organising bookmarks is surprisingly shit. It doesn't allow grab and drag for putting stuff into new folders, and if you try to C&P, it erplicates stuff and then seemingly moves shit between the two folders you're trying to transfer stuff between at random. I can't work out how the fuck you're supposed to make this work for the life of me.

God, I loathe incompetant programmes!!

EDIT: And now it's deleted all my drow resources. That was a not-inconsiderable amount of links that took me several weeks to collate.

I am Not Pleased^TM.

Kittens! Kittens for sale!

Sun, 20 Sep 2009 11:09:07 GMT

We Will Rock You was awesome. Well worth the wait - it's always nice to go to a musical that doesn't take itself too seriously.

With regards to the title: Would anyone like a kitten? The ones we were fostering at the surgery are all ready to go, but one of the B&W ones doesn't have a home. The mother may also be up for grabs - I think one of the nurses has said she'll take her if no one else wants her; she's a tortie who is massivley friendly, and, strangly for her colouring, is rather calm.

Also on the subject of kittens: Some idiot woman brought one into the surgery as a stray on Friday before pegging it. Why is she an idiot? Because it's blatently obvious the damn thing is owned on account of the fact it's wearing a collar.

Argh. Some people.

He's a boisterous little B&W boy who can't be more than 5 months old. He'd probably taken himself on a bit of a wander and was quietly heading back home when she scooped him up and brought him to us. Unfort, if that collar ever had a tag on it, it no longer does, and he's not chipped - unsurprising, most owners wait until they get the animal neutered to have the chip done - so we have no way of finding who he belongs to.

If anyone in bath sees a missing poster for a cat matching the above description, call me, will you?

We didn't want to send him to the RPSCA straight away, as that will drop the chances of being reunited with his owner quite drastically, so we're hanging onto him until Tues. I've been popping into the surgery twice a day to feed and clean him out - kennel life is really not suiting him. No matter how many toys I give him, he gets so bored he wrecks his kennel, and then is so happy when I turn up, he won't stop purring.

He's also so desperate to play that I'll stand up from cleaning him out and discover with some surprise that he has latched himself to the back of my thigh and is enthusiastically attacking the hem of my cardigan - apparently, I've been relegated to the status of 'litter mate' with regard to play, so the look of surprise on his face when I scruff him and put him back on the floor is quite priceless.

Less funny is the fact that he's so anxious for human contact that for the first half an hour I'm around, he lies on my feet and won't let go. If anyone has ever tried to do normal tasks like cleaning a litter tray with a 5m kitten imitating an anklet on your left foot while happily chewing on the top of your flip-flop and purring himself to pieces all the while, you'll know it's not nearly as cute as it sounds.

Checking the computer, however, no one has so far rung us with a disappearence matching his description. I'm starting to wonder if he's either from somewhere further afield and hopped into the back of a car or something, or if he was deliberately dumped/something has happened to his owner.

If so, is there anyone else that would like a kitten? He's very sweet - would probably do best with someone who's home all the time, or who has another cat of a not-dissimilar age to him (he'd annoy the piss out of a mature feline). Or a tolerant dog would do the trick; he's too bright and resultantly needs too much stimulation to be left on his own for large parts of the day.

My mobile has decided the ability to make outgoing calls is for loosers. I suspect this means my contract has run out, but I'm not exactly impressed with 3 for cutting service without contacting me and maybe giving me the option to renew or extend first.

They still haven't quite reached the unholy-piss-pot of bad customer service that is O2, mind, but it is still very bad customer service. Unless they have a reasonable explanation, I'm going elsewhere. Orange, maybe - Doug's never had a problem with them, or possibly vodafone. Who does everyone else use?

Right housework...oh, how I hate thee!

"Injury? Did someone order some injury?"

Mon, 07 Sep 2009 11:01:06 GMT

"...Who had that as their main?"
"Oh, my good sir, that would be myself, over here!"
"Ah, madam, there you are - I do apologise it's taken so long. Here is your side of insult."
"Oh thank goodness - you know, one really isn't the same without the other!"

Translation: Am ill in bed with food poisoning.

Gramps

Sun, 06 Sep 2009 20:05:53 GMT

This weekend, I was up in Wales at my Grandparent's place, (supposed to be) celebrating my grandfather's 90th birthday.

Yesterday, at approximately 3:30pm, slap bang in the middle of the pre-party BBQ, his heart stopped.

This was not unexpected. Back when he had his triple heart bypass, the doctors told us it would by him another decade of life at the absolute most. That was 22 years ago.

Their place is right out in the middle of the sticks, so myself, along with an uncle and a couple of cousins, performed CPR until the ambulance turned up.

This turned out to take a time in excess of 20 mins. I have pulled several muscles in my back. We broke two of his ribs.

Given the doctors also said without the CPR, he would definitely be dead, I can't bring myself to regret this fact.

The paramedics gave him far more adrenaline than should probably exist within the human body and managed to get his heart started again. Then he managed to bite* them while they were attempting to intubate him.

Feisty old bugger, my Gramps.

They took him to the only A&E in the area, which was over on the coast. By the time we got there, he was conscious again, although the shock meant English was a bit too much of an effort, so he was reduced to speaking only in French, occasionally smattered with Latin.

They told us that the next 24-38 hours would be absolutely critical, and he'd spend that time in the ICU. Half an hour later, he'd stabilised so much, they told us with some shock in their eyes, that they were going to move him to the ordinary cardiology department.

Today he was fully compos mentos, albeit very hyped up on morphine, sat up in bed, opening his cards and sneaking bites of birthday cake around his oxygen mask. He has become something of a celebrity in the hospital given that he is still, against all odds, alive - apparently it's very rare for a family to attempt CPR in similar circumstances, most just freeze in shock, and rarer still for them to manage it successfully, which boggles my mind, but there you go - and so he's had loads of visitors who aren't family. Even the paramedic team that saved him went to see him this morning before their shift started to say hi.

He is still, the doctors hasten to assure us, in a very critical condition, and the next week will be very wobbly.

Resultantly, if I am short tempered, grouchy, suddenly and without notice unavailable, and all associated manner of off-ness, I would ask people assume it is due to this unless I state otherwise, and could they either cut me some slack, or at least wait until after next Sunday to take me to task over it.

Oh and to finish off the weekend, coming back from the hospital last night, some idiot took a corner too fast, swiped by Uncle Martin's bumper and ended up in a ditch at the side of the road. Nobody hurt, but both parties will need new bumpers.

Then later that same evening, my brother's girlfriend rang to say *she* was in her local A&E. Her brother (she's babysitting her siblings while her parents are out of the country) was being driven home by a friend when the car span out of control and slammed the passenger side into a tree. Cue being stretchered to hospital and loats of x-rays. He was eventually judged to be badly bruised but fine, and released home at about 3am.

Everything happens in threes.

* - 'bite' is possibly the wrong word. We'd removed his dentures fairly early on as they were blocking his airway, so when I say 'bite' I possibly mean 'gum with viscious intent'.

Not the Best.

Tue, 01 Sep 2009 11:17:01 GMT

Which is not to say it was bad, just that it didn't come up to the standard previously set by events throughout the year. Which, it has to be admitted, was abysmally high.

There were some high points - performing surgery on Puppy was one - am amused no one seems to have noticed that Rega knew exactly what she was doing messing around in someone's body cavity - and the RP around the three deaths on Sunday night.

I enjoyed the battle, but feel they didn't push us particularly hard. I think it was more feeling out the new battle site, but next year I hope they make more aggressive use of those hills and make us sweat blood to succeed in them, but this year they were obviously being cautious.

Had great fun monstering, esp. since was part of the squad that took down High King Tristan on the battlefield, and later mugged Queen Cercy during the monster slot. Lions had better fear me baby.

Have no idea what to do with Rega's vet pick. Part of me wants staff use, but without armour or body dev, I won't get that much use out of it yet.

Armour would be a sensible thing, but means I have to OOC buy some.

More corp would be useful - I always run out and having healing makes it easier to make friends.

Maybe some elementalism - I hadn't realised mage was so vastly more useful than shaman until I got to play with it as a monster.

I am unlikely to take more shaman - mindless monsters are just too common for it to be a worthwhile investment, and pretty much any higher up monster or player has fearless, so unless I were to get another level 1 shaman and then get it ritualled up - by who, I don't know, as Siegbert is blaming the entire catastrophe with Knell Sheddan on Rega and has refused to go into the circle again with her, and I don't trust the Rigans as far as I can spit them - to get my hands on more charges of Spirit Bolt or Sleep, I don't think it's worth it.

And then there's the vet pick list for Dark Elves - something I have been told is hideously overpowered, but honestly, I can't say I agree. Trolls, Ogres, Humans, hell, even Dwarves, I believe it can be argued are at least on a par, if not ahead of us. Chameleon looks quite cool, but I don't know if I'd have the opportunity to use it - I can't see Rega going for long wanders on her own in the forest. Resist magic is always useful, but as a greater shaman it's not especially urgent for me to acquire it - I have other means and methods if pushed. Intuition requires a ref, which always makes me hesitate, and Rega is paranoid enough about what she eats and drinks that poison resistance is another of those would-be-nice-to-haves, but is not overly urgent. Which leaves sense trap, and that's not an ambush; that's a physical trap.

It would fit her backstory, I suppose, but don't think I'd get much use out of it.

On the outside is contribute to ritual, and while on an OOC note it would be lovely to get involved in that sort of thing, IC I can't see her wanting to enter a circle again for a long time, and see above note in the shamanism for the question of who the hell would take her in there now that Isileth has had his lead borked.

Don't know folks - what can other people see Rega doing? Currently the ones highest up the list of possibilities are
Chameleon
Armour (OOC cash permitting)
Mage 1
or Corp 1 for the second time.

Opinions? How was everyone else's event?

And back.

Sun, 23 Aug 2009 20:35:34 GMT

Well, that was an...interesting holiday.

Number of times got trapped in a lift: 2.

Number of times got stuck at the bottom of Lindos after father borked the gearbox and we ended up rolling backwards down a 1:5 slope: 1.

Number of times got stranded in Lindos after repair guys who promised us a lift back to hotel had a memory failure after a mere 30 secs and drove off without us: 1.

Number of donkeys needed to scale my way up to the temple of athena: 0. Hah!

Number of hours I was home for before I got a text from sibling 1 complaining about sibling 2: 8.

The hotel was...nice, with the exception of the food and the hotel manager. The food, I believe, can be blamed on the hotel manager. I still have not worked out whether the man was a legend or merely certifiable.

For instance: He gave guests random cuddles (thankfully picked on my sister, rather than me). He interrupted a traditional greek dance evening to hi-jack the keyboard and pick out a one-handed tune which I finally worked out hours later resembled 'Why Don't You Do Right' as once performed by Jessica Rabbit.

On our third day at dinner, he'd obviously been informed that it was another guest's birthday, so they were presented with their dinner with sparklers stuck in it, while he treated them to a very loud, and rather operatic rendition of 'Jingle Bell Rock' in the middle of the restaurant.

He was fond of having the items at the dinner and breakfast buffets switched at random. This meant there was one morning when my sister, sleepy headed and not quite paying the attention she should have been, came back to the table with a plate, not of chocolate covered crepes as she'd thought, but of chocolate covered cheese omelettes.

I suspect he was the driving force behind the odd items that would occasionally crop up at dinner. The banana and liquorice cheesecake was one. The roast pork in apple sauce where the sauce contained no apple, but lots of mint and ouzo was another. Then there was the turkey breast with orange sauce topped with grilled tinned peaches.

And then there was the ice cream incident - at least, we think it was ice cream. It was in a glass, topped with a dark syrupy sauce, and of top of that was chocolate shavings. So my mother picked it up, thinking it was chocolate based, or maybe, at a stretch, coffee.

Of course not - we all tried a tiny bit, but none of us ate it. None of us could work out what it was either. The closest descriptor we could think of, and it still isn't 100% is redcurrent and petrol.

Total travel time to get back was approx 14 hours, but that started at 11pm at night, so when I finally lay down to nap this afternoon, it was after I'd been up for around 30 hours.

My arms are sore. Dragging the suitcase plus indulging the younger sister to go on the doughnuts has strained my biceps from the feel of things. Hope we don't have any big food deliveries at work tomorrow, may have to ask the nurses to move them for me.

So, now for 3 11+hour days, a theory test for my driving and then renewal. No chance on getting Rega's priestess robes done in time then, given I've not even finished cutting out the sleeve lining so far. I can't decide if that's a good omen for her survival chances or a bad one.

Oooh. Sleep now.

Update.

Wed, 12 Aug 2009 14:33:49 GMT

I am knackered to the point of tears from new shift pattern.

I am in a bloody foul mood.

I am not particularly looking forward to Renewal, and thanks, but I don't want to talk about it to the world at large.

I am off on holiday in 2 days. I have no idea if I have everything I need. I don't have the energy to pack and find out yet.

Going to see GI Joe in the cinema tonight. Missed HP due to my own slackness.

Dinner in oven already, then I'm going to have a nap, then see if dinner cheers me up. This will be the greatest test of my beef-fixes-everything hypothesis yet.

EDIT: Beef will apparently not fix everything. Beef-cooked-decently fixes stuff. Bloody-expensive-beef-rib-you-bought-to-spoil-your-other-half-but-then-overslept-and-overcooked-which-is-now-all-dry-and-frankly-brisket-would-taste-better-than-this just makes stuff worse.

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 22:00:10 GMT

New rota killing me STOP

Half day tomorrow thank god STOP

Off to bed very dead am I STOP

Finally, another Gor parody for those that enjoyed Houseplants STOP

Lesbians: Putting lemonade in your fallopian tubes via university since 1963.

Mon, 03 Aug 2009 14:44:29 GMT

Wholeheartedly stolen from madwitch, but too good not to share.

Ok, so, many of you who read this will know that Mr T. Pratchett, who seems a fairly awesome guy even if I don't like his books, was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, and more recently, has spoken out in support of assisted suicide because chances are, someday, he's going to need it.

In the comments of the article, up pops this guy, who claims to be able to cure him.

Poking around his website is a godo way to spend half an hour if yuo aren't all that attached to your braincells and enjoy laughing at how people get some things so utterly, utterly wrong.

The title is a reference to it: for one thing, he claims manually massaging the fallopian tubes, using your hands which you have inserted into the woman's uterus, past the cervix, will cure all infertility.

On the subject of what causes the blockages, you get this lovely little quote:
All blockages that I have found have been dead bacteria, or sometimes lemonade which is a result of a country wide practice of lesbians at Universities.'

And have another, for you've all been good/bad*
If the deliverer cannot put both hands in the birth canal after birth and clap then the mother is considered ‘tight!’.

Apparently, this guy has a son who he delivered using these methods. I say if anyone is in the vicinity, we rescue his poor wife.

*delete as applicable.